Autistic Child’s Family Targeted by Vicious Anonymous Letter

Published August 19, 2013 by April Fox

By now, you may have heard about or read the disgusting letter sent to the parents of an autistic child in Newcastle, Ontario.

My first thought, despite generally being a pacifist and too small to do much damage to anyone, was that I’d like five minutes alone with a piece of rebar and the pathetic piece of shit that wrote the letter. My next thought was that I really want to hug the hell out of those parents, because God, what a horrible thing to have to read. I felt physically ill reading it. I can’t imagine reading those things directed at my own child. I can’t imagine the kind of cruel and damaged mind that would make someone say those things, either.

My next thought was that this idiot could use some writing lessons from my autistic kid, not that I’d let him within a hundred yards of such a caustic person.

I have a friend who is raising two beautiful, bright little boys with autism (and one equally beautiful and bright boy without, just to keep things interesting). She posted about this on Facebook earlier, and made an excellent point: “I don’t think raising a child with disabilities is horrific by any means, but raising a child who would pick on one would be.”

YES. Exactly that. Our kids have autism. They have a challenge that makes different parts of their lives more difficult. Socializing, communicating, being heard, simply finding comfort in their environment: these are challenges our kids face every day. Our kids also have a million different gifts, both in spite of and because of their autism. They are quirky, they are insightful, they are charming and wise in ways that the writer of this letter could never in a thousand years hope to be.

Children with autism are human, above all else. The person who wrote this filthy letter is worth no more than the sack of garbage I just took out to the curb. Old orange peels, coffee grounds, wadded up tissues full of snot and other things you don’t want to touch: none are as vile as the kind of person who could say these things about a child.

This blog is not anonymous, unlike the cowardly letter this cretin wrote. I have no problem at all putting my name and face to this statement: those parents, and that child, are worth a million of you, hiding behind your excessive exclamation points and gaudy pink paper. I hate knowing that you’ve reproduced, because it sickens me to think that you will be raising other humans to be just as ignorant, cruel and disgusting as you are. We are not ashamed of our children, but if you had one ounce of self-respect, you’d be incredibly ashamed of yourself right now. You’re pathetic.

*Edit: I just posted a follow-up to this, addressing some of the problems this letter-writer has, and offering some solutions. You can read it here.


12 comments on “Autistic Child’s Family Targeted by Vicious Anonymous Letter

  • This is an open statement to the author of that letter.
    The statements that you have made are insensitive, hurtful and demonstrate a juvenile mentality. People with Autism, are still people. Though not always apparent they have feelings just like you.
    I understand your frustration with your neighbor’s behavior. Children with disabilities can be frustrating, and exhausting. I say this from experience; I am raising a son with autism. It is difficult but having him in my life has given me a greater sense of humanity that I otherwise would not have. You should open yourself up to acceptance of his diversity; clearly you could benefit from a greater sense of humanity yourself.
    Take a moment and try to understand the frustration that this boy experiences every day. Like any child, like your children, he has needs, but he does not have the ability to express them, at least not in a way that most people can understand. The voice inside his head is screaming for someone to help him, understand him, accept him; but when he tries to speak all he can produce is the “noise” that you complain about. He hears it too; it is not the sound he wants to make. If he had the ability to articulate his needs verbally, like your “normal” children he would.
    You are a coward. Everyone has the right to speak their minds. If you had taken ownership of your statements I would not hesitate to defend that right, but you have not. You have chosen to hide behind anonymity. If you lack shame for the hurtful things you have said you should at least be ashamed that you are not taking responsibility for them.
    I will not hide my identity; I take full responsibility for everything that I say. My name is Wade Huntley, I live in West Jordan Utah, I operate a website: where my contact information can be found. You are welcome to contact me yourself. Be warned that I may post any communications that I receive from you and if you reveal your identity to me I will disclose it publicly.
    Finally, I am making an open offer of $100(USD) to anyone that can positively identify you as the author of this letter. It isn’t much but it is all that I can afford. Given the hurtful things that you have said I doubt it will require any reward for someone to reveal who you are. If I am able to confirm your identity I will post it publicly on my site and I will provide it to your local news stations.

    Wade Huntley
    Proud father of an autistic child


  • I have not read the letter and after reading your post, I have no desire to. I recently had a wonderful experience with an autistic little girl was not known to bond easily. She came up to me unsolicited while I spoke to her father and took my hand. I was moved. As for the writer of the letter in question, Ignorance and cowardice are best friends and often keep company with each other. They deserve each other.


  • Sorry, previous reply to your post, second sentence should read “I recently had a wonderful experience with an autistic little girl who is not known to bond easily”


  • I cannot help but wonder what this “mother” (I use that term LOOSELY) would do if her child suffered a life-altering injury or illness that rendered him/her “not normal” (another LOOSE term).


  • The person that wrote the letter is a coward, she is afraid to sign her name. I refuse to call her a mother she does not deserve the name. I do feel sorry for her children , she is raising them to be bullies too.


  • After reading this letter I was embarrassed for the person writing it. Personally I was furious for the parent of the autistic child. I hope that they know if anyone finds out who they are I am pretty sure they will be the ones moving when everyone who supports this family comes together. This family has more courage, strength and wisdom than you will ever have. Don’t you think that if they had a choice they would have a healthy normal child. I am pretty sure that every parent out there wishes for that, however sometimes that does not happen, and it makes you a stronger person whether you believe that or not.

    I certainly hope that you were just having a bad day and that those are not qualities that you teach your own children. Every person disability or not should treat others how they would like to be treated, obviously you don’t want to be treated with respect. Any real person would have just went and spoke with the parents if there was a problem not sent a typed letter that was so uncalled for. No I do not live near you and no I do have to hear what is going on daily, however if the child is not being abused and he/she is outside playing, and trying to have as much as a normal life as possible who do you think that you are to say such mean, outlandish comments such as what you posted in your letter. It is a sad thing to read such awful comments towards a child.

    To the parents of the autistic child: keep you heads held high and keep trying to give your child a normal life. There is absolutely nothing wrong with allowing your child to play outside, be seen or heard in the community. A disability makes a child a stronger person and when you are having a bad just think about the support that I am sure others have given as well. Wishing you are and your family only the best in the future and hopefully you will never have to hear or read those awful words ever again. Sending HUGS!!


  • I find all of this repulsive and disgusting. My oldest daughter was on the autism spectrum with asbergers, although she was not diagnosed until she was 17 (not well known until then). I was lucky. She was a beautiful child with a beautifully creative and genius mind. Now she is an artist. My ex-husband’s oldest son after our marriage broke up was autistic. I spent some months working with him a couple of times a week. The joy I felt when this child finally sat in my lap, wanting to read with me, who loved dancing around, singing silly songs from an old childhood songbook I had, and cuddled with me, was unbounded.

    I truly hope that the recipient of the letter, April, and all the other parents who have commented on this never have to face that again or for the first time. Personally I think the letter should be given to the police to prosecute as a hate crime, as she advocates basically killing the child and using his parts for science. Truly disturbing on so many levels. Venomous, spiteful, horrid woman.


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