The Migrating Patterns of Winged Canadians, and Other Mysteries

Published March 22, 2012 by April Fox

Thing one, as you know, is a lovely combination of brilliant and autistic. If he’s interested in something, he researches the hell out of it, studies it, lives in it. He can tell you everything you want to know about Star Wars, the solar system, Dungeons and Dragons; he knows a whole lot about a whole lot of things, but obviously, ornithology is not one of those things.

Thing one: Baby girl says Canada geese-wait, is that even a real thing?
Me: Yes.
Thing one: Okay, she says that Canada geese fly-wait, can geese even fly?
Me: Yes.
Thing one: Okay, maybe I’m thinking of ducks. Can ducks fly?
Me: Yes.
Thing one: Maybe it’s chickens. Can chickens fly?
Me: Some of them can, yes.
Baby girl: I’m pretty sure you’re thinking of penguins. Penguins can’t fly.
Thing one: Penguins, ducks, whatever. Ducks can’t fly as high as hawks, right?
Me: I don’t think I’ve ever seen one flying that high, no.
Thing one: Okay, good. [I don’t know why it’s good. I didn’t ask.] Anyway, baby girl says that Canada geese fly south in the spring and north in the winter. Is that true?
Me: No.
Thing one: HA. I knew I was right about something in there.

And with that resolved, he went back to his maps.

 

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